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- "One who eats trout from river is blessed with trout…"

- "Be careful of the hook, it is painful…"

- "If you see a bear, run like hell… the other way."

- "A rising trout is a hungry one."

- "Eat the fish eyes; it'll put hair on your chest."

- "Another fly-fisherman is another competitor, no matter how much you smile."

- "A bait fisherman is a fisherman who hasn't graduated yet."

- "A bait fisherman hates your guts no matter how nice you are to him. All because of the jerk who waded through his favorite hole without asking 10 years ago."

- "Road kill is more fly tying material."

- "A puddle with expanding rings, has to have fish. It just has to."

- "Drive 80 miles an hour to your fishing hole, but always slow down to look at a new one."

- "A bad cast is never your fault."

- "A tailing loop, is a fancy name for expert trying a new cast."

- "Always carry the chainsaw to retrieve flies."

- "That's Psycho Nympher not Psycho Nymph-O…"

- "You really haven't reached the pinnacle unless you are in the middle of a huge lake in a float tube, have an urge, and then think what the hell and wet yourself."

- "Fly fishing videos are addicting even though they are the most boring videos on the face of the planet."

- "Usually the best fly to use is the one that does not resemble anything on the water."

- "When talking to another fly fisherman always use acronyms. For example - I took that one on a PMD, but the BWOs are hatching. CDCs will work also.-"

- "If you are with an experienced friend on the water, make fun of the fly fisherman downstream who cannot cast no matter how hard they try."

- "Always recommend a fly that is 6 sizes smaller than the one you are using. It makes you look like an expert fly-tier/fisherman."

- "Always buy car air fresheners to hide the stinky waders and wader shoes in the trunk."

- "Always beware of the experienced fly fisherman who has been fishing for 30 years. He literally knows too much."

- "A float tube or pontoon boat is always quicker to a spot on the lake in which a shore-fisherman has just caught a fish. It is quicker than walking all the way around the reservoir."

- "If you are on the lake in your pontoon boat / float tube, announce to the world that you have a fish on.  It echoes and you will get attention from everyone around you."